Today's Inspiration: Living Out Loud

In A Field of Dreams

2010-12-28T10:44:00.000-08:00

At the end of the year, I am happy to see me entering a new territory and dreaming again... (I hope that you are too). I have spent a lot time during my holiday break refocusing on my dreams... as the whispering voice that said to Kevin Costner in this movie, “If you built it, he will come”… also whispers to me... so I have started to build again -- in my Field of Dreams...
In thinking about this today, I've wondered what are our dreams but objectives... aspirations... plans... hopes... wishes and ideas... And how many of us have actually started building on these things...?
I often wonder if the journeys we take by ourselves are not just "for" ourselves - but also for others... And if they are (also for others), then perhaps we "should" continue to build so that people can receive these wonderful gifts we have to give them (when they come). For how else do you supposed we got to these different places in our lives, and with the things that we have, if it weren't for the BUILDING of hopes and dreams, wishes, plans, ideas and valuable work of others? ...
And who is this they that is implied will come but people (like you and me) that our ideas, hopes, wishes and dreams have been given to us to help...
I bet it probably sounds crazy to talk and think out loud like this... and I am probably just dreaming... but I believe that no matter how big or small we think of our dreams, that they do matter...
So I hope you are encouraged this year to cultivate your dreams... because you never know who will actually need what you build - in that field of dreams.
Take it easy,
-Chana

Food for Thought

2010-06-30T10:09:00.000-07:00

'I like that “I” can find “you” in “me” and “me” in “you” and (still) call it “myself”...'

'Whenever there is a hole in my sidewalk, my romance of my self-discovery helps me to get out of it.'

'I know that I said that you have to learn how to love yourself before someone else can, but I never imagined I would have to find out if it was true...'

'Why is it when we feel safe and comfortable enough to be our true selves (which is the child inside…), people call this immature... as opposed to "courageous"?

'I don’t always know what I want sometimes… but I (at least) know that I want to know what I want, sometimes…'

'Since love exists with or without us, why do we put ownership on it and say “I” love you?...'

'My reality of loving someone else is as personal as my reality of loving cheese… and if I don’t look for the cheese (that I love) to love me back for loving it so much, why would I look for something in return from people? Love is a gift…'

'Whenever I get lost and search for who I am, I usually find myself hidding behind my likes and dislikes…'

'I used to feel special knowing that I was an individual, until I opened the door to myself and discovered that there are a lot of people just like me (individuals)…

Now I'm kind of upset knowing how being an individual can make you quite ordinary...'

Food for thought...

-Chana

The Gift of Solitude, Inside of Me

2010-05-28T09:02:00.000-07:00

'One of the nicest things about my life now is that I am here (with me) in it.'

'Feeling my feelings is an insightful process, but actually processing what I’m feeling helps to return me back to myself again...'

'I really didn’t discover this "being here" piece as much as it just smacked me in the face… And when it did, I cried... I cried because I knew exactly how I felt (and why)... And I (surprisingly) didn't run or talk myself out of it, but I just sat there, like a friend, and let myself cry.

It was amazing...'

'I'm learning, when someone asks me how I am, the answer is really just for me to know, as opposed to them receiving this information...'

'It’s good to let people know how I feel; but it’s hard for me to share how I feel with everyone.'

'My struggle with letting some people know how I feel "bothers me"… But before I say “I'm working on this”, I know that my knowing I am bothered doesn't necessarily require me to work on anything... But me loving and accepting myself (being bothered) is (required)...

-Chana

A Choice: Weightlessness & Free Falling

2010-04-21T13:06:00.000-07:00

Knowing Rome wasn’t built in a day... and even God created the heavens and earth in "seven days", I am reminded how there are some things we desire to do that can’t be done all in one day either...

So we can really just relax and Free Fall... or... we can choose to be heavy...

-Chana

The War Within

2010-03-16T13:04:00.000-07:00

It's been said that the spring time is the season that kings often go to war... and although I am no king, I know what they're talking about...

I hope that buckling down and paying attention to the way that I train today so that I can build upon my disciplines tomorrow is enough... For everything that comes "at me" and pulls "on me" (these days) doesn’t come from outside of me - but from within...

The War Within...

Continue to Train,

-Chana

Never Ending Relationships

2010-03-12T10:43:00.001-08:00

... Some people wonder should you really "stay friends" after a relationship is over ... and I can't help but wonder how they can split up the two...

My experiences taught me, although circumstances in our relationships change, the reality of our relationship with another person doesn't...

For we may no longer be within the same "frame" of that relationship... but the content of that relationship still lives...

I can attest to my relationships living (and continuing to live) in the most intimate parts of my thoughts, memories, heart (and even some of my other relationships) long after a parting... So it becomes important (to me) to internally (and eternally) stay friends, because the truth is, a relationship "never really ends"...

-Chana

A Beautiful Moment

2010-02-25T07:49:00.000-08:00

I consider myself lucky to have had the chance to speak with a woman today because of my response left on Amazon's website about a book that I ordered...

I had a wonderful thought in seeing that we were supposed to talk today...

I noticed how beautiful the thought was that I didn't know this when I woke up (and neither did she)...

I like how beautiful my response became in wanting to make peace with her thinking she was responsible for my book arriving later than "I would have liked"…

I thought to myself... How beautiful would it be for her to change her own thinking... or to at least notice it...

It was quite the moment to have...

I enjoyed these thoughts and this stranger whose thoughts I knew too well... because I too used to believe thoughts that told me I was responsible for things that had nothing to do with me (too)... and that's when I noticed the growth...

What a moment....

-Chana

A Peace of Acceptance

2010-02-24T11:10:00.000-08:00

I left my desk and went for a stroll today.

I stood at a window and watched the wind blow over, around and on the sides of a water… It looked like rippled potato chips, and this looked beautiful to me.

I smiled...

I crossed my arms behind my back - while cupping my hands together and took it all in.
I was enjoying myself...

I walked off slowly enjoying the rest of my stroll.

I admired the building I walked in… its beauty began to attract me.
I thought back to how crazy I was, wishing I wasn't working here.
but I'm sure we all can relate to wanting to be someplace else...

I just remember wanting things to change... and I was upset that it wasn't...

I created a lot of unhappiness for myself at that time... thinking that things should be different than it already was...

Today I know that am exactly where I'm supposed to be... and I love that my eyes see this.

A friend asked me something this morning.
She said: Sometimes, she thinks whenever she says that this is where she should be, that it’s just her being lazy… and it’s just her staying in this one particular place because she doesn't want to do the work it takes to leave...

So how do “I” know “for sure” that “this” is where God wants me to be…?

Is this just where we are because it is comfortable...?

I listened to her and slowly proceeded to respond..

I think we are where we are because we are supposed to be - and I know this to be true because "we are here"...
I am starting to notice, many of us believe God has made some kind of mistake (a mistake with us "personally", a mistake in where we are and with what we have in our lives)...

We often think things should be different, "we" should be different... and we (for surely) should have different things in our lives... Right?

Wrong...

I can assure you that those thoughts are just a trick that your mind plays on you to continually rob you of God's great gift of peace...

I know that I am supposed to be in "this"place (at this time) - because this is where I am…

And I know that my sister and I were supposed to talk on the phone last night - because we did... ...and if we didn't, it's because we weren't supposed to…

But how can you know that you are not "just being lazy"...
Well, you can start by knowing that you are not just being lazy because laziness is a word…

and you can’t be a word…

You can’t even be the meaning that people attach to words…
You can only be yourself...

So, be yourself, and accept where you are, and the rest will fall into place.

This always brings me peace...

and I hope it does for you too.

Enjoy

-Chana

IN Balance

2010-02-24T08:40:00.001-08:00

Something poetic whispered in my thoughts today about balance… and since I was open, I got what it said…
It said:
I am in balance...
in balance,
in balance...

I am there …

And right then, it became clear...

I used to believe that balance was something I found...
something to look for (even)...
or something I simply needed to do (in order to become)...
But today I can see that balance is more so of who I am…

Did you know, we are in balance because we are balance?...
Yes...
Just think about it…
If ever we get too far to some extreme (outside of ourselves), God arranges our lives to come right back to the center of where He is, so that we can live inside ourselves again...

In Balance…

Isn't this wonderful news...?
I think so...

-Chana

Stay Connected

2010-01-12T08:43:00.000-08:00

In view of staying connected, I wrote this piece on my whiteboard located in my kitchen. It says: "To stay connected, you have to stay away from the people and things that causes you to not show up in all of your splendor... because "you" should be here". Stay Connected."

Although easier said than done, I know to not make way in this area "of doing" is time wasted, as we all should be committed to having a better relationship with ourselves and to having better experiences in life. For there is nothing like feeling disconnected from the life you were sent here to live.

Stay Connected.

-Chana

End of The Year Transitions

2009-12-30T12:26:00.000-08:00

'There are times in my life when things go so well that I know (without a doubt) that I was born to do this... But then there are times when things turn out so poorly that I begin to question if I knew anything to begin with...'

'It's quite easy for me to stand behind my gifts and still be received in people's hearts, but it is a sure challenge for me to stand in front of my gifts and hope to reach their hearts still...'

'It amazes me how I can sit and talk about much of what's really nothing and very little of what's really everything and some people not even know the difference...

But I wish they did...'

'I find that focusing too much on myself cause me to miss out on people, but focusing too much on people causes me to miss out on myself...

So I found a way to just be alone (together)...'

'I believe all of us come into the world with the answers we spend the rest of our lives searching for... but it seems we would find our answers (much quicker) if we would stop changing our minds about the questions along the way...'

'Explaining who I am (to someone else) is like explaining how therapy works... You kind of just have to have your own experience...'

'Some of my most fulfilling conversations are the ones that consist of more than just words... as words (alone) have been known to distract me from the most important part of what a person has to say...'

'While listening and learning in silence, I realize a person's true intentions are rarely ever verbalized - as much as they are implied...'

'The longer it took for me to accept who I was, the longer it took for me to become who I've always been... which (surprisingly) is just myself...'

'I often tell people (that I talk to) to just relax and be yourself (whoever that is...) because nobody will know the difference anyway...'

'The day that I realized I could not return to my past, is the same day that I stopped trying to relive it. Thank God that drama is over...'

'As friends, companions and even acquaintances in life, we either add weights or help to lift them off of each other... so I've decided to take the time to decide which one I'd like to be.'

'I know I've said this before, but when you feel and hear your life calling you to do something, simply answer it, instead of wasting a lot of time looking for it...'

'There are some things I just can't pretend I don't see in a person just to be friends with them...'

'The approval we get from other people is easy to accept, but I also learned it is also the stumbling block to the truth that we ultimately have to do this for ourselves...'

'I don't know why I ignore God's voice sometimes on the inside, but turn around and get upset with Him when I don't find the answers outside...'

'I’m learning, I actually have to stop talking about my feelings to actually feel them...'

'Opening up teaches me there are some things we will never know about ourselves until we let other people into our lives... We really "are" all connected.'

'I used to think that holding in my truths about things that bothered me in my relationships would salvage things... but I find it only creates distance... And although it was hard (at first) to do this... opening up to talk about it actually made things better... (if not just for me).'

'Could it be our attracting people we consider bad isn't the problem... as much as being attracted to that which is bad is? ... Think about it….'

'I am constantly learning... in order for me to heal from things in my past, I need more new experiences - instead of explanations, and more new relationships - as opposed to a bunch of reasons why...'

'If what's really important isn't found on the surface, why do we put so much emphasis on the way things look?'

'You ever wonder why listening too closely to what a person says causes you to miss out on what they mean? ...'

'I wondered why it's so common (and seemingly easy) for the world to share themselves "in bed", versus what's going on "in their heads"... And why peopole seem to get so mad when people don't read their minds, when the truth is, they've never shared their scripts to begin with...

End of the Year Transitions...

Enjoy,

Chana

Breaking My Obsession & Learning to Live The Questions

2009-10-19T13:10:00.000-07:00

I'm learning to find the patience that enables me to sit back and “live the questions" -- the questions that I have concerning life... and it is taking time.

It is taking me time to love the questions in which I have to live... For the answers to these questions (which I seek) are not yet coming because I can’t yet live them… And until I am ready, I guess they will forever be "a long time coming".

So, I've decided to (just) live...

-Chana

Cracking The Ice and Jumping In

2009-10-08T17:08:00.000-07:00

Today, I can hear the same messages repeating themselves...

Perhaps they are messages that are just for me, but they are also the messages that are the loudest, messages that "stand out" and the messages that are the pattern (which is the theme of my life).

Yes... it keeps repeating... and I'm listening...

It seems I have been listening (closely) for the longest days that have turned into years...

But not so close that I cannot hear clearly... But close enough to hear a clear sound that echoes (even in the distance) what my life is...

For like a moving river, flowing beneath a thin sheet of ice, the life that is me is waiting... It is waiting for me to crack open, grab hold, to catch on and to jump in.

For it is only when I jump in that I will get to reach the end of where my life is leading me

So, I've jumped...

I hope you do too.

--Chana

Pieces In The Aftermath

2009-09-23T05:56:00.000-07:00

One day it will all make sense...
And the person I know it will make the most sense to is me... For every name and face that once occupied a familiar space will begin to fit into its rightful place, and until then, I will keep picking up the pieces.

I can't understand what happened or what's going on really, but lately, I've been feeling like things aren't quite connecting like before... Or perhaps they are... but it's just taking "time" to shift into place... Well, until this process is done with me, I guess I just have to wait...
So, I wait...

I keep trying to write a letter to Jane..., but I can't seem to finish it.
I keep tyring to tell her something, but I never seem to get to it...
And quite honestly, I don't know (yet) what that is...

I've been trying to figure out how I got here...
On this page, on this path... and in this life experience...
I wonder what's really going on... as I feel like I've been in an accident and this is the part where I recover - not only my memory - but also my sense of self.

From various places (it seems) I gather pieces of what was torn, broken and fractured... and I try to piece it all together again... on papers, in prayers, in conversations, memories of losses and gains, in feelings, observations, and in community and solitude...
I've even started therapy...
Yes... Psychotherapy...

I wait patiently for the day that my life begins to sound the alarm...
... where the hidden currents (flowing like this river I can't seem to let go of - metaphorically) finally escapes to reveal to me its path...
And until then, I will continue to listen and pick up these pieces In The Aftermath.

-Chana

Maintenance Check

2009-06-29T09:12:00.000-07:00

For many of us, negative self talk is a habit...

I was in the habit of saying negative things to myself (under the disguise) of "pushing myself" out of complacency...

But the truth is, I was nothing "but" complacent whenever I was negative... so I stopped… and instead, I work on not over identifying with things (such as works) that are outside of me.

For I know who I am and what I am worth is not determined by what's outside of me -but what's inside...

So, why all the pushing to begin with?

I thank God for the Maintenance Check.

-Chana

Do Not Faint...

2009-06-10T11:24:00.000-07:00

It seems, the most challenging days of my life are the ones where I have to walk alone and still be strong and courageous...

Although I may feel a bit "faint" at heart, I cannot faint... For it is in these moments that I have to be most encouraged and reminded that "God did not bring me out this far to take me back again"…

As I remember too that his plan is to prosper me, not harm me...

So how about I take a look at how far I've come and Keep Moving Forward.

--Chana

Seize the Day

2009-06-10T07:56:00.000-07:00

At 29, I find myself thinking deeply on the sum of my life experiences... They seem to lie along the road of my perceptions, faith, beliefs and opportunities (both missed and also taken)...

Although I can see how some of my experiences in life are set up as great chances to advance, I can also see how my not being taught to see this (early in life) created many obstacles in my ability to seize such moments...

For the one who walks without the full knowledge of he is, is blind to the things he has… And the one who does not know what he has simply squanders it away...

The opportunities…

Please: Seize the Day, and try to get a hold of this part - early.

Dimensions of Gray

2009-06-04T13:01:00.000-07:00

Dimensions of Gray...
Spending time in places that can waste my time says to me that time is more valuable than anything..., so I should use it wisely.

Dimensions of Gray...
If work is not about money, but about purpose, then I have to find out what I'm doing on mine... or else I will only be getting paid...

Dimensions of Gray...
It seems like punching a clock was man's bright idea...
But what if it was really for nothing...?

Dimensions of Gray...
I know wanting a better life and having a better life are two different things..., for one actually requires me to work...

What a gray day...

Dimensions of Gray...

Knowing The Way

2009-06-01T09:07:00.000-07:00

When you begin to know “the way", you will come across people who will not support or encourage you... and I can't be sure of the reason why...
Instead, I just find the guidance...
For there is a guidance to be found in the "No" of doors closing, relationships ending and things changing...
We have to trust it... and continually trust God in these matters... as there is also a message and direction to be found in the "Yes" of doors opening...
Learn to hear this and respond with a "yes" back... as this (in its own way) will show you "The Way" that you should go... And when you get to that place that "the way" leads you, and you discover it's the place you really wanted to be..., be sure to say thank you… and then help somebody else.

-Chana

Sharing More Thoughts/ The Bridge to Happiness

2009-05-27T12:55:00.000-07:00

'It came to me one day while riding the train, that the bridge between my contentment and happiness rests in my own acceptance" of who I am, where I am and how I am... for only then do I experience the gladness of my soul which leads me to satisfaction.’

‘I used to jokingly say that I was an undiscovered writer... But I soon discovered, the person I’ve been waiting (most) to appear and discover me is myself...
Thank God I finally showed up.’

‘The day I stopped waiting for someone else to endorse and approve of what only I can give permission and approval to, I saw my dream was much closer than I thought...'

‘I’ve never really had a problem with wanting what other people have in life... because wanting what only I’m supposed to have is enough for me to try to get to.’

‘I think it's really okay for people to make plans with their life... but I've found more success and peace along the path of discovering what my life actually plans to do with me… as I am a witness it’s usually not what we originally planned, because I for surely didn’t plan for this...’

‘I never understood why people chose to follow other men when Jesus clearly said to follow Him… It makes me wonder if the book has been lost…’

‘If the soul is the essence of who we really are, then I know I'll have to wait to see who others are... as my own glimpses of witnessing my soul was like witnessing a wild animal out in nature. I really had to just sit there... and observe... and be quiet…
Versus crashing through the woods and demanding that this person come out… NOW!’

‘It's painful sometimes whenever I notice someone trying hard not to be noticed… But I usually help them out and ignore them -- just to make it a little bit easier for the both of us.’

‘Although “letting go” sounds like a passive thing to do these days… it’s actually one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.’

‘I find the things I put off and avoid most are actually the things that add to my happiness… And considering this reason being because of fear, it makes me wonder if I’ve really been afraid of just being happy...’

‘Sometimes, I don’t know what the day or future holds, but keeping the faith through them both keeps me moving forward to see exactly what that is...’

‘I find that living the truth that is in my soul is the only way that fits for me to live… For playing a role that contradicts who I am inside (although promising safety) doesn’t feel that safe at all…’

‘Embracing the truths that I constantly receive feels way better than the stories I sometimes create... so I practice just sticking to the truth…’

‘The love and power of God is indeed a wonderful thing, but getting to know this God and loving the person that He truly is has been a more fulfilling experience for me.’

-Chana

Sharing Some Thoughts

2009-05-26T08:36:00.001-07:00

'When you’re unsure what you’re called to do, simply get started with what you think it is and expect God to guide you as you go.

‘Sometimes, I get the feeling that I take myself way too serious... but then I remember, it’s just a feeling…’

‘In the spirit of all of those before my time who truly write, I too understand why I write. ... It's because (for me) there is no other choice...

‘Of all the time spent looking outside of myself in wonder about what I’m called to do in life, I found it easier to just listen … as I realized a calling is something we hear - not see...
And once it is heard, we can only respond one of two ways:
Yes or No.’

‘For some time, we spend parts of our lives being afraid (of success, love, being right and even being wrong)… and this is where it got us so far - here...
But what if we decided to spend this part of it NOT afraid, to see what that gets us?
I bet it will be something different...’

'I spend quite the time writing about love because I’ve found the place where it lives --inside of me.’

‘In listening and learning in silence, I can see how we are forever teaching and learning from each other (whether we mean to or not)… And no matter what subjects we teach, we always teach others what we value…
For some people, that is money, achievements or just the self centered self…
But for others, it is a great deal more... such as love, support, wisdom, trust, commitment, presence, peace, truth, happiness and God's Spirit.’

‘I find the knowledge we often pass along to others is not something we’ve learned or studied either... but it is often just who we are that people see and learn from as they later reflect upon that in themselves.’

'I can see some of my greatest lessons in life came from the people I’ve hurt and those who’ve hurt me... But some of my greater lessons came from the random people who often showed me what “not” to do (too)…’’

‘They say: One of the hardest things to do sometimes is to listen to our own hearts…
But I say, one of the harder things to do is to realize that we have one to begin with...
A heart...
I hope you are listening...’

‘At 29, I learned if people in my life cannot adapt and adjust for me the way that I do for them, then they are not the people I need to make room for. This was a lesson on learning “when” to let go.’

-Chana

Love & Some Kind of Wonderful

2009-04-23T10:53:00.001-07:00

I know God doesn't play favorites, but seeing him move in my life sure makes me feel special.

I am always learning and growing, but there are some lessons that make me wonder if the rest of the world gets this too... But, I'm sure they do...

Lately, I've been learning profound lessons on "self love" and it's (literally) "making me over" inside... (which is the only makeover that counts)...

Over the past weeks and month, I've discovered: True love is only possible when I accept God's love for me.

And it is only when I accept his love that I am able to really love myself - which is important... Because it not only teaches me how to love other people, but it gives me a clue to anybody else loving me, and if they are doing this right. But how would I know this without doing the work (first) myself?

I must admit... this created quite the shift in me, and it changes the way I see things and the way I relate to others... as I used to always try to bond with people first - without really bonding with myself... But, what a difference today makes...

Although I feel kind of embarrased exposing myself this way, I know this is the very music of the world that we all could stand to hear.

So, I will continue to play it, proudly, and settle in the happiness of knowing God's light shines in on our darkness, because He lives in us.
And the best part of that (for me) is seeing that He lives in us.

For that is the only way we are able to see anything in the first place.

And that's what makes my life Some Kind of Wonderful...

Later

--Chana

Thoughts & The Inner Voice of Love

2009-04-22T08:26:00.000-07:00

I sat here at my desk thinking and wondering: Where do we get this inner critic from? Why do we sometimes say (and think) such horrible things to and about ourselves?
And on top of that, why do we think other people think this about us?
When the truth is, these are our thoughts about ourselves...

I wonder... how did we become so unloving?

It has stood out to me over the past few days:

When I fail to love myself, I also fail to love others.
And whenever I do not love or act loving to others, I am actually reflecting my own lack of love for myself.
And I know I am not the only one…

But who cares, right? (the critic says…)

Well… I do.

As I believe (somehow) we are each other’s healing.

It is my prayer (and constant work) to connect and stay connected with my innate truth that I am already good enough, loving, lovable and love.
For this is how God made me... (

in his image).

Over the weekend, I wrote a few notes to myself on my cell phone while out and enjoying the weather, and one of them said: Perfect love is already in us. It is not something we find outside (career, accolades, achievements, materials, relationships, etc). For God is love. And He lives inside of us… So we are love too.
And all of the things we all have - outside of this - are only extra...

As they only add to our experiences of a love (that’s already there)…

And they provide us with more opportunities to show exactly what that is…

Love.

Let us be this today – first to ourselves and then to others.

And that critical voice?
Tell it to go to hell…

Sign of the Times?

2009-03-31T07:20:00.001-07:00

The morning news made me look for the Phil Collins' song, In the Air Tonight, as I learned from my local news that President Obama is headed to Europe to meet with other world leaders to discuss a "global stimulus" plan....

I'm not gonna lie... It made me think about the revelation regarding the signs and seals, the mark of the beast (concerning our inability to buy, sell or trade) and the implications about one currency, one world government... a new world order... and all that other (seemingly scary) stuff we love to dismiss and leave to the fanatics...

Today, I can't help but wonder if this is leading us there.

You ever wonder why some homeless people can speak a heart wrenching truth, but people (uncomfortably) laugh and ignore them...?
It's because they look crazy, right? Well, how about this...?
Because this looks crazy...

After listening to the media's spin and watching the "Eyes Wide Shut" on different commentators' faces that managed to grin, I called my sister to tell her about my thoughts on what's happening in the news. I also called my mother...

I really want people to wake up from their slumbers and listen. Although I'm not afraid of these times, I am compassionate (seemingly more now than ever) about spreading the Good News (aka The Gospel)... as I know it was written: These things "must take place"...

And "when the Good News about the Kingdom is preached throughout the whole world, so that all nations will hear it; then the end will come. (Matthew 24)

So I ask, could this be a sign of the time?
I believe so...

But can I say, like Phil Collins, something is coming in the air "tonight"?...

Of course not... because no one knows that day or hour... (Not even Jesus).
So don't be fooled.

Keep the commandments of God, keep living life and, keep your testimony for Christ, and be encouraged.

The rest is just TV...

Later,

-Chana

Beyond the Surface, Far Away From Here

2009-03-25T12:40:00.000-07:00

It seems, beyond the stars and beyond the surface of stars, I live and I dream far away from here.
Beyond the Surface, I am a dreamer... for I see with eyes far away... and as I see, I explore - and as I explore, I find...

And when I find, I listen... And as I listen, I hear…

And what I hear causes me to gamble...

And when I "gamble", I actually grow...

And as I grow, I blossom...

And as I blossom, I ignite...

And as I ignite, I inspire others to be what they’ve been called to be... which is A Star... shining beyond the surface...

For beyond the surface, we all are stars…

Just far away from here...

Catching On and Taking The Train

2009-03-24T05:24:00.000-07:00

There is a true somebody living inside of all of us... but some people I meet haven't seem to have caught on.

Why We Are Here...

2009-03-23T12:17:00.000-07:00

I sat up one night thinking how we are all winding down on our time.

Some of us are winding down sooner than others--because of health, age, or just because it's time… so I try not to waste any of mine. Time...

I wonder, why we wait (sometimes) until the the last few hours of a person's life to let them know that we love them (or how much we love them)?

Isn't "life" too precious for that...?

I am learning how we are all here to love, support and to help each other… As this (I believe) is a part of God’s purpose in why we meet in the first place...
We all seem to innately help each other to connect back to God (inside), as this (too) is a large part of our purpose.

Since we "know" that we are all winding down on our time, let us not wait until the last minute (any more) to offer each other the greatest gift we actually have to give... which is our presence...

Give more of it (today).

Later,

- Chana

A Friend To My Soul

2009-03-17T10:33:00.001-07:00

Wanting you to talk to me...but also knowing I have to let you be.
For I am learning how to be alone together.

I have to let you come to me.
As our souls always show up on its own…
I want my soul to show up and sit with me again.
I want your soul to show up and sit with you... And maybe, one day, we can sit alone together.

--Chana

Like The Birds

2009-03-13T10:47:00.000-07:00

Getting to the things that we want in life can seem like a pipedream when we ignore the elementary truths like Faith and Trust...
We often get to one thing - and worry about the next... And when we get to that, we worry about something else...

I can relate...
Because getting to parts of my dream in my life was hard too... And once I got there, I too started to worry about what to do next ... But, how crazy is that, when worrying doesn't add anything to our lives? The scriptures tell us not to worry because "life" is more than things...

And then we are reminded to look at the birds...
For they don’t plant, harvest or store food , but they always eat...
And just as our heavenly Father feeds them, we too have to know that he will also feed us... Afterall, we are far more valuable to him than they are... (as Jesus died for us - not them...)

So the next time you find yourself worrying about things, try to remind yourself to be like the birds...
Oblivious.

Thinking of You

2009-03-12T12:31:00.000-07:00

I'm thinking of a place that is warm and accepting,
A place that allows me to be free,
A place that doesn't focus so much on the self,
A place that was created for me,
A place that invites you,
A place that invites me too,
A place to listen freely,
A place to sit and be heard,
A place that says "give if you want",
A place that inspires my words,
A place that allows me to exchange,
A place that doesn't demand my history or even care about knowing my name...
A place that simply loves me,
because it has so much to give...
A place that I fit in and belong and have known since I was a kid
A place that I spend hours in silence... and listening to the wind,
A place that I get to close my eyes while the sun kisses my face and skin

A place that I connect with,
A place where I'm not ashamed,
A place that I express unguardedly and truly leave refreshed and "changed"
A place where nothing else matters,
A place I sometimes grow to miss,
A place that lives insides of me and even helps me to write like this

What is this place? This place is love. And love? I am thinking of you...

Our Greatest Reward

2009-03-05T09:48:00.000-08:00

To do something other than for the sheer joy of doing it is fraudulent to me... because I know my greatest reward (really) comes from me just being able to minister to another person's heart with that thing I do... Who cares if they notice the way I do it...?

I've noticed how there are some people who want to land a record deal, versus just wanting to make music..., and some who want to write books, but have nothing to say?... But then I realized, we all (at some point) can be so insecure (and afraid) of not being enough, that we pursue things and dreams of being seen, just to convince ourselves that we are. But, you have to know that you already are...

I wrote a message to myself that said: Just because people don't acknowledge seeing you, doesn't mean that you are not here...
And it's true...
So I remember, it is for the sheer pleasure and joy of doing what I do that is most rewarding to me; and everything else that I gain... (such as getting noticed or what-have-you?)
is just extra...

Discovering The Way

2009-03-05T09:12:00.000-08:00

Discovering "the way" (to live and to be) is different for everyone... For no one knows our destination (or the direction that we should go to get there) but us and God. There are times when I meet people who sound so confident about knowing my path... But the truth (I know) is, they don't know....

My answers usually come to me on the inside... and this inside is cultivated in my relationship with God. There are times that some of my answers surface like shiny small goldfish in a still pond... and when I'm quiet and sit long enough, they just float to the top (like bubbles).

The Chase

2008-08-12T12:26:00.000-07:00

If you're anything like me, you have probably (at some point ) "chased love"... as if it were running... And if it ever "really" was -- why in the world would you chase it...?
I find we chase love because we've had a momentary glimpse of it -- that lasted for but a moment... But it only lasts for a moment because we leave out of its presence...

Sometimes we run from love and then go off chasing it (as if it went somewhere)... Only to discover that love is always right where we left it.
Inside...

I used to take off running to search for things I already had, but didn't quite see or understand that I possessed... But when I stopped the chase and was love (because I am love)... I could actually see that love really is right here.

-Chana

The Romance of Self Discovery

2008-08-12T11:00:00.000-07:00

Some say that they love me for who I am... But who they think I am (often) is not who I am... So I wonder about this person that they say they "love" when we are together...

I don't know who that is (exactly).... And I don't know who it is they think I am (at times) either...
But I get to see who that is when they shares their idea of who I am not...
For it is in these moments that who I really am becomes so clear...

And I think this is romantic...

-Chana

it's not a bad word

2008-05-15T07:03:00.000-07:00

It's not a bad word...
NO, it's not a bad word...
No... is not a bad word...
It's actually a very powerful, clear and direct word that a lot of people are afraid of...
And it's okay if you use it.

Yes... It is...

I dunno

2007-09-14T12:38:00.000-07:00

when I am tired or frustrated, I blog.

when I am insipired, I blog.

today, I am neither tired nor frustrated... or inspired...

I am a bit depressed.